Tuesday to Thursday (21st November – 23rd November), I was sent for a course. This is called a mandatory course where one needs to sit for some papers in order to be considered for a future promotion. Somehow I got my parent’s permission to stay out during this duration of course and surprisingly they agreed. Tuesday morning I was feeling very uneasy. Surprisingly I was not hungry. I just felt really gloomy and down. I thought perhaps I’d be hungry during lunch but yet another surprise, I was not. No breakfast and no lunch and I still felt very full and restless.
Just as I was reassessing myself as to what could have triggered my weird feeling for the day suddenly I received a call from my office mate Janagi. Janagi asked me if I heard from my ex colleague Devi from morning and I said No! Asking her further about why is Jan suddenly looking for Devi, Jan just paused and said “Cat…..”. My immediate reaction was “NO!!!” and Jan replied ‘YES’. I was speechless for one minute and I could hear tears in Jan’s voice. I asked how and she replied she was not sure but all she knew was that Devi fainted and was left unconscious. To verify things I called Devi’s hand phone and it was picked by her sister in law and she told me the news that my good friend and ex colleague had passed. I just could not believe the news. I have blog’d a few months ago about the passing of her husband, Uncle S and I’ve also mentioned about spending the school holidays with her and her 11 year old son and our stay in Cititel. I just can’t believe it. She called me the day earlier and told me she won’t be at office saying she’s going to the court to get the hearing of her husband’s LA. Her husband did not leave a will and that was what the court hearing was about. She went to the courthouse with her lawyer and her 11 year old boy. Her lawyer dropped her and her son at the entrance of the courthouse and went to park his car. When he arrived Devi was unconscious, she fainted and just fell and lost a lot of blood. She passed on her way to the hospital. Friends assumed she must have had some heart problems as she’s been having breathing difficulties for the longest time. Her son also said that she vomited blood a few days earlier but she just warned him not to tell anyone.
From the time of her husband’s death she kept telling daily that she can’t live without her husband and how she wants to go to where he has gone. Just never knew it would really happen so soon. I went to her house that evening. I arrived at 5.30 but the body had not arrived. The son looked very quiet and calm. I was not sure how to console him. Her mother still alive was crying at one corner. The whole situation got worst when the body arrived at 7.30pm. I could not bear to see her lying there. Memories of how we use to talk all came back. I left her place at 8.30pm. I just could not take it. The funeral took place the next day at 2pm. I was at my course and just could not go for the funeral. I felt really bad. Whenever she use to tell her about her death, at times when I get annoyed I’d reply her saying “ don’t worry if anything were to happen to you I’d take a day off and be there by your side”. I wish I could tell her sorry for I can’t make it. I could not sleep the whole night thinking of her and her kid. Things got worst when I heard that her son was adopted. I never knew this till now. I’ve got so many things to ask Devi but she’s no longer here.
I was told not to grieve too much for a death or they will not rest in peace. I don’t grieve but the memories are just something that will live in me. I will miss her. I just pray and hope everything will be fine with her adopted son.
Thursday, 11 May 2006
Saturday, 8 April 2006
BLACK SATURDAY
THis past 3 weeks I've been constantly making visits to this one particular Hospital to visit my friend's husband who was admitted in the ICU. Sadly Uncle did not survive. He passed on Saturday the 8th. Weird how so many deaths took place on this day. Two other collegue and friend lost their father on the same day yet I felt most with the passing of Uncle S.
I knew uncle for almost 4 years now through his wife. His wife and I used to work together but now she's transferred to another place. He was a very nice, jovial, interesting man. I remember spending nights over their house and I always had fun with their 11 year old son, Kabi. I just love squishing the little one (smiles). Such a perfect family now torn apart with the word DEATH!
The last I stayed in their house was about few months ago and in the morning while uncle was sending me to the office he was advising me to get married early and not late like he and his wife did. He was going on and on about the effects of late marriage including not able to bear more children.... Those were actually his last spoken words to me.
Till today I can't accept the fact that he's gone. I remember his wife had a mild stroke in 2002. He was the pillar to her recovery. On of the things he did that actually moved me to tears even today was that, I was told unlce would climb up the Batu Caves steps with his knees and then when he reaches the top, he would break down and pray. He was indeed a loving man who cared so much for his family and it is for him that his wife now drives with speedy recovery from her stroke.
Doctors diagnosed uncle's death to be too much toxication but I have my serious doubts. When I tell people about my doubts they would say "if a man is fated to go, nothing can stop it!". They are right in a way but explanations must be acceptable. My deepest question would be how can a man with a stone in his bladder end in high toxication after his surgery? Question I can only ask but never get an answer too. I asked this very similar question when my ex passed 4 years ago.. At that point I asked.... how can a guy with wisdom tooth extraction diagnosed as a leukimia patient when he was a Doctor himself and he didn't know!!!!? Life is just so unfair! My heart aches each time I see people in their 80 's still living strong while God punishes the good and younger ones!
No matter what my anger is, I can't bring the dead back to life! I looked really stupid trying to console uncle's wife telling her to be strong always for I know her pain is something no one can comfort except for the man she has lost. I speak this out of experiance and hence know the suffering of loosing the one you love and care and nothing anyone says will ever heal the broken heart.....................
I knew uncle for almost 4 years now through his wife. His wife and I used to work together but now she's transferred to another place. He was a very nice, jovial, interesting man. I remember spending nights over their house and I always had fun with their 11 year old son, Kabi. I just love squishing the little one (smiles). Such a perfect family now torn apart with the word DEATH!
The last I stayed in their house was about few months ago and in the morning while uncle was sending me to the office he was advising me to get married early and not late like he and his wife did. He was going on and on about the effects of late marriage including not able to bear more children.... Those were actually his last spoken words to me.
Till today I can't accept the fact that he's gone. I remember his wife had a mild stroke in 2002. He was the pillar to her recovery. On of the things he did that actually moved me to tears even today was that, I was told unlce would climb up the Batu Caves steps with his knees and then when he reaches the top, he would break down and pray. He was indeed a loving man who cared so much for his family and it is for him that his wife now drives with speedy recovery from her stroke.
Doctors diagnosed uncle's death to be too much toxication but I have my serious doubts. When I tell people about my doubts they would say "if a man is fated to go, nothing can stop it!". They are right in a way but explanations must be acceptable. My deepest question would be how can a man with a stone in his bladder end in high toxication after his surgery? Question I can only ask but never get an answer too. I asked this very similar question when my ex passed 4 years ago.. At that point I asked.... how can a guy with wisdom tooth extraction diagnosed as a leukimia patient when he was a Doctor himself and he didn't know!!!!? Life is just so unfair! My heart aches each time I see people in their 80 's still living strong while God punishes the good and younger ones!
No matter what my anger is, I can't bring the dead back to life! I looked really stupid trying to console uncle's wife telling her to be strong always for I know her pain is something no one can comfort except for the man she has lost. I speak this out of experiance and hence know the suffering of loosing the one you love and care and nothing anyone says will ever heal the broken heart.....................
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